Today i went to Amsterdam to check out a band that goes by the name Nuff Said. I’m seldom overwhelmed by Dutch bands, but these guys surprised me. Good songs with some very catchy riffs. If i had to put a lable on it, it would be bubbly rock. It was a big bummer that they started at a ridicilous hour (11 pm) and i had to leave for the trainstation when the band was just starting to warm up.

Before that i enjoyed a very pleasant evening at Guys place, who introduced me to another friend of his. I’m terrible with names and although i think i remember hers, i’m not going to take a gamble. But what i know for certain is that she is very nice, articulate and totally into Frank Zappa. I could not have wished for better company.

It will be no surprise that at some point i had to mention Conny’s death. At this point all roads lead to Conny one way or another. I’m truelly amazed and grateful that this is never a bombshell that spoils the mood. That i can talk about this without being treated as someone who is suffering emotional leprosy. That what i am going trough is a human experience that others are interested in with the purest intentions.

Later on we cycled to the gig. I have never ride a bike through Amsterdam before and i really enjoyed it.
Amsterdam does not have the overwhelming beauty of Brussels or Paris, but it does have thousands of nooks and crannies where you can discover something unique. Amsterdam can be anything you want it to be. Whatever you are looking for, you will find it.

After the gig I enjoyed a twenty minute hike to the trainstation. It would have been a perfect evening
if it wasn’t for the following event. Right after the train left, the train hit something or to be precise, someone. I’m not sure if it was an accident or a suicide, but the event did make think on how much impact it has on so many different people. For what it’s worth, my thoughts are with all of them.

Carpe diem people! Carpe diem!

Newspaper De Volkskrant have asked the The guys of Boom Chicago to comment on the American presidential election. I leave it to you to decide if it is funny or not.

The idea itself is interesting. Maybe we Dutch should return the favour and start a Boem Amsterdam in Chicago. Wouldn’t it be great to make a show that would fill you in on all the details about the elections in the Netherlands? Who wouldn’t want to hear more about the clash between giants like Jan Peter Balkenende, Wouter Bos and Agnes Kant?

Hello? Anyone?

Don’t believe me? Just watch this video!

The 10,000th Shoplifter Award – video powered by Metacafe

Many thanks to Stephen Simon for sending me the link.

This picture was taken prior the match between the Netherlands and Italy yesterday evening. The final score of the game was 3-0.

3-0!

The last time the Netherlands defeated Italy dates back to 1978. The last time Italy was beaten in a tournament by a three goal margin was in 1970 when Brazil beat them 4 to 1.

3-0!

I bet that Sinterklaas and Ruud had a ball in Bern all night long.

Only 4,99!

A Dutch family visits a store that is specialized in sportswear. The youngest member of the family is a boy and he finds this beautiful jersey of the German football team. He turns to his older sister and says: “i decided that i want to support the German football team. There is nothing that i would rather have for my birthday than this jersey of the German mannschaft”.
His sister slaps him around the head and says: “are you out of your mind? You are Dutch! You can’t support the Germans, you little traitor!”

So the boy goes to his gentle loving mother. “Mummy, i decided that i want to support the German football team. There is nothing that i would rather have for my birthday than this jersey of the German mannschaft”.
Mom slaps him in the face a few times while yelling: “that is not how i raised you young man! If you want to support another team besides the Netherlands, it has to be a proper team, like Brazil or France. Shame on you! Good thing your grandmother can’t hear you.”

Luckily there is always his father, a great sports fan who is able to respect any team that excels in their game.
“Daddy, i decided that i want to support the German football team. There is nothing that i would rather have for my birthday than this jersey of the German mannschaft.”
A second later the poor boy gets kicked around the store by his furious father. “i don’t care if you take drugs, become gay, or convert to radical islam! But i will never ever allow a child of mine to cheer when the Germans score a goal! Now get in the car!”

A few minutes later the family is driving back home. The boy is silently crying. His father looks at him through the rear view mirror.
“Well son, i hope you learned a lesson today.”
“I did daddy.”
“I’m glad son. What did you learn?”
“I learned that i have been supporting Germany for less than an hour and i already hate those stinking Dutch.”

I am more and more neglecting my duties for Freak Magnet, a podcast so secret and underground even the Freemasons have never heard of it. It would be great if there was someone who could fill in for me from time to time. But not just anyone, it should be someone who has the same qualities as me when it comes to talking English behind a microphone.

After listening to this video, i am certain that the Ivo Opstelten would be perfect. Problem is that i don’t think  he will have much free time, being the mayor of Rotterdam and all. I also have to wonder if Ivo is as into bands like the Butthole Surfers as me.

But if Ivo’s English is the standard the next mayor of Rotterdam will be measured by, i’m the perfect guy for the job.

Yesterday i discovered that i missed out on the biggest Dutch internet phenomena since Kazaa. I’m talking about Hyves, the Dutch equivalent of Myspace. Everybody’s on it and i do mean everybody.

I share an office with three co-workers and they all have an Hyves account. And they all are each others friends in Hyves. In fact, everyone of our company who has an Hyves account accepted all the other Hyving co-workers as their friend.

If you are friends you can “scribble” each other. So if you have found an picture of a naked man, tactically covered with chocolate eggs , you scribble that to your friend.

I found two cousins who are on hyves, one niece and three or four old classmates. I found them by simply typing down their names in the Hyves search bar. Who needs Big Brother anymore?

The “highlight” of my journey through the Dutch Hyves was a female colleague who was wearing a sort of fish net shirt and no bra. Despite the fact you can’t see anything nasty, my ickyness level rocketed sky high. There are things that i really don’t need to know. I do hope for her that she will never have to search for a new job, since Dutch employers love to use Hyves to find out more about their job applicants.

I was offered a Hyves account last year. I kindly refused, since i had no idea what to do with it. I still don’t and i still don’t understand why other people want one. I guess i am not only a hermit in real life but also on the internet.

This is my favourite adress for anything electrical, from rechargeable batteries to banana plugs, they have it. The store keeper is über Dutch. I never had or witnessed a conversation with him where he would not make a snide remark leaving the customer feeling hopelessly inadequate.  If you can get over that, this is the best place in Haarlem to go when you need new dust bags for your vacuum cleaner.

This establishment in Haarlem is where you need to go when you need to repair or dry-clean your clothes. The people who run it are Turkish immigrants who are too well behaved to interact in a truelly  Dutch fashion. To make up for that, they decided to offend the customer right of the bat with the name of the store. In my case i’m not only lazy, i’m also a weakling since i can’t make my wife to go there for me.

Not only do the Dutch love to offend, we love to use the English language whenever we can.  I’m happy with that, since Handige Man / Luie Dame would not make much sense to most of you.

It’s about freaking time.

Instead of that crap, people will get the chance to appreciate that part of the city for its historical value and that history includes a whole lot more than just whore whopping. It will take a lot of time and a whole lot of tax money, but it is worth it. Who knows, maybe in ten years i will be able to walk around there with some friends from abroad and be proud instead of ashamed.

Link: “Total overhaul for Amsterdam city centre”